Walled In


Another day the sun has risen, a gift they say. Some days I believe it and other days I feel it's a curse. Yesterday was better with a slow descent, but today Is a different day; perhaps it will be in reverse and not get worse. Perhaps there is no pattern, perhaps it is all... Continue Reading →

Free Flow


And with a sigh, I again place my fingers upon these keys. I am not sure what to write, I only know that I must. Will this one be in a rhyme or flow as freely as the Thames? My head is aching and it has been for quite awhile. I would blame it on... Continue Reading →

Daily Maintenance


Say thank you, open eyes, stretch, drink water, get out of bed. Stretch, smile, be grateful for another gifted day. Toilet, wash hands, continue gratitude, get dressed, stay out of head. Take out the dogs, warm up food, trust everything will be okay. Drink water, eat, wash dishes, let the dogs back in. Grab bag,... Continue Reading →

Long


Exhaustion has possessed me. It could be depression; it could be burn out. Whatever the case may be Here I am; here...existing, just about. I've been in therapy now for five weeks. It will be a long slow process; I shall remain devout. I've searched through my own valleys and my own peaks, I seemed... Continue Reading →

Where is the Joy?


It is like I am walking out of the horror story a survivor I may have lived, but what of me have I lost. An innate will to live was the driver But what quality of my life was the cost? I should be smiling, ecstatic even, but that emotion is caged within, and I... Continue Reading →

Run


Where am I to go as I am running away? I don't know the answer, I just know I cannot stay. Feet pounding on the ground with each step that I take. I am entwined with fear every moment of my wake. In slumber too I cower beneath the tidal wave. Great things have come,... Continue Reading →

Suspended


It is here that I am paused, my breath abated. I am suspended between complacency and displeasure. Awaiting the cue that my inner demons are currently sated, That I might traverse my life again at my leisure. It is a precarious place to be you see, To wonder curiously yet frightfully, What path might soon... Continue Reading →

Tethered


In a corner I sit, detached, without light. My legs pulled in, my mind begins to write. Sadness has blanketed me in a cold embrace. I release self-chastisement; unable to give myself grace. No blame can be placed outside this vessel. I sit tortured by the demons I've tried to wrestle. They have me fragmented... Continue Reading →

I Chant


The shadow of the flame dancing in the moonlight. The steady stream of dark smoke taking flight. An aroma releases as the herbs burn. Stride by stride around the circle I turn. Entranced by its dance I chant my prayers; Seeking guidance, I turn to the gods upstairs. My own strength cannot be relied upon;... Continue Reading →

The Fight Within


This must be my test now, these voices are so deafening. Screaming in my head, I can't hear myself think. Louder and louder they become and they are threatening. I slid heavily, yet welcomingly to the brink. They repeat, "You're not enough" and the space I occupy is wasted. They poke and prod reminding me... Continue Reading →

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